while i could not drag myself to seek another home, you had a warm, comfortable stay in mine. When you left, easily finding another home. I have wondered, if it was that easy for you to find comfort in another house, if you could only understand how I was gaping for air, as if I'm holding my breath for a long time and the only way I could breathe out is to be in the warmth of my home...how could you not give back it to me? 

If only you'd knew how hard it is for me to form an emotional connection and to love another person.

That doesn't seem like it, for you.