gillan,

they said the hardest relationship is the healthy one after a toxic one.

it somehow feel like it is. i'm scared, gillan. can i even be in a relationship? i feel like i am such a toxic person to be around with it. i just have too many issues with myself. i promised myself that if i ever break his heart i am never going to forgive myself... he's been through so much and i don't want to hurt him more.

why am i like this, gillan?